


My Dearest John

by foxy_johnlocker



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Bottom Sherlock Holmes, Established Sherlock Holmes/John Watson, Fluff, House Cleaning, Kissing, Love Letters, M/M, Married Couple, Reminiscing, Smut, Top John Watson
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-07
Updated: 2017-01-07
Packaged: 2018-09-15 14:14:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9238535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foxy_johnlocker/pseuds/foxy_johnlocker
Summary: Sherlock and John are cleaning up their flat a bit when they find some old undelivered love notes Sherlock wrote to John.Each chapter will be centered around one note (one of them is smutty which I marked at the beginning, the rest are totally kid-friendly haha). Not gonna be too long, but I had this idea and it's too cute to pass up despite season 4 hell and finals week.





	1. Chapter 1

"Sherlock, what's this?" John called.

"What?" Sherlock hurried over.

John held up a slightly crumpled piece of paper with writing on it. "It says..."

"I know what it says. Where'd you find it?" Sherlock was upset, but after a few years of marriage, John could discern when there was embarrassment underneath his facade.

"Here, behind the cupboard. Bloody mess!"

"Sorry."

"Well, what is it then?"

Sherlock paused, fidgeted. "Nothing... that's really old..."

John knew that throwing old memories was hard for him. He gently put a hand around his waist and led him to the sofa to sit down with him. He kissed his lips sweetly and said, "It's ok, Sherlock, love. You don't have to tell me."

"No, I want to - I should. It's just... embarrassing."

"I know. Come here." They kissed again for a long time in each other's arms, then finally Sherlock got up and straightened his shirt. John loved when he did that.

"Well then, I guess you should read it," Sherlock said matter-of-factly. "Where..."

"It's here," John replied, holding up the paper. "But, uh...  _what_ is it?"

"It's... a note. I wrote to you. Back when we weren't in a relationship. I... never gave it to you."

John's heart melted. "Aww, Sherlock... Are you sure I can read it?"

"Yes," Sherlock said quickly and went to get back to cleaning up.

"No, stay here, love!" John called. "I want to read it with you."

"Okay, John," Sherlock responded and walked back to the couch with a loving eyeroll.

 

_John,_

_I need you to do something for me. Don't get married to Mary._

_It breaks my heart to see you with her. I don't know what it is, I'm_

_still figuring that out. Just give me a little time. She's not right_

_for you, trust me on that. Please forgive me for all the hurt I_

_caused you, and forgive me for this. I am sorry, John. This isn't_

_at all what I imagined things would be like between us when I_

_first met you, but it's all my fault. You deserve so much better._

_Just let me figure this out and then I can fix it. I promise._

_Sherlock_

 

"Aww, Sherlock, that's so sweet!"

"You think?"

"You should have given it to me." John laughed. "Did you really know Mary was an assassin even then?"

"No, I was just in love."

" _That_ was the thing that was 'wrong' with her?" John smiled at his husband with adoring eyes. "I love you, sweetheart." He gave him another kiss.

"Love you too," said Sherlock, blissfully happy.

 


	2. Chapter 2

"John?" They were cleaning the flat again after a short cuddling break.

"Yeah?"

"I found another few notes..."

"Jesus, how many of those did you write?" John laughed.

Sherlock smiled wistfully. "Well, I was silently in love with you for six years while you went through girlfriend after girlfriend. It was... hard..."

"Yeah. Right. I was an idiot. I'm sorry. But now you're mine, baby."

Sherlock smiled down at his lover. "And I'm yours."

 

_My dearest John,_

_I think you ought to know that Irene means nothing to me, and that_

_in fact, the heartbreak you believe to be directed towards her is_

_directed towards you. Though I do not expect that you will reciprocate_

_my feelings, I nonetheless deem it best to tell you of them in the_

_hopes that perhaps the misunderstanding may be cleared up. Do not_

_worry if you think Irene Adler is replacing you in my life. As a friend_

_or as a lover, I value you infinitely more._

_Sherlock Holmes_

 

After reading this, John had to brush away a small tear that had formed on his cheek. He laughed a little and embraced Sherlock. "Oh my God, the Woman... I was so jealous of her. Really, you noticed that? I didn't think..."

"Of course not. You never considered the possibility that I have emotions. I should have..."

"No, it's my fault. But it's all over now. We're finally together."

"Yes, thank God."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, I appreciate it! Let me know what you thought in the comments :D


	3. Chapter 3

_My John,_

_In writing a speech for your wedding I have felt my heart_

_break on more than one occasion. I can hardly bear the_

_thought of seeing you dance with another person. I feel_

_more joy and love than I can express when we sometimes_

_dance together in the flat, though it proves difficult for me_

_every time not to kiss you. I hate that I'm simply teaching_

_you to dance with someone else. I may never give this to_

_you, but if I do, know that I love you and long for you_

_more than words can express. But your happiness is more_

_important than mine. So I will stay silent._

_Your Sherlock_

 

"Are there more?" asked John.

"A few. You... enjoy reading these?"

"Of course, my love. They're so sweet."

"Don't try to hide your schadenfreude."

"What? Sherlock!"

"Ah, you must love reading about how I suffered while you went on fucking all those women without a care in the world. Naturally!"

John was offended. "No! Look, if you don't want me to read them, it's ok..."

"No, no, go on," Sherlock responded with a wave of his hand.

 

_Dear John,_

_I'm not dead. I needed to do something about Moriarty, and_

_I guess I have, but that was never the way I intended. If at all_

_possible, I had to keep you safe, and so I couldn't tell you at_

_first. But I also hate to think you are grieving when you don't_

_need to. Wait for me to come back, John. Wait for me._

_SH_

 

"Why is this one here? Don't tell me you were living in the bloody flat for two years while everyone thought you were dead."

"What? Oh, that! No, of course not."

"Then why's it here?"

"Well, I kept it in my... coat pocket. I always took it out, went to a mailbox somewhere... then remembered I could not endanger you for the world. So I never sent it. Sorry."


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: here's the smutty note. Probably will be the only smutty note in this work so you can just skip this chapter if you're not into that. Have fun for those who are ;)

 

"Oh, that one? That one was after our first time. There's a... er, there's a backside. If you can make it out. I crossed it out, it was too embarrassing."

"Oh, I'm sure it won't be." The afternoon had become more of a couple's time rather than an attempt at spring cleaning, but John hardly minded. He loved his Sherlock even more now.

 

_Dearest John,_

_Thank you for the lovely date. You could hardly imagine how_

_wonderful it was for me. I hope you feel the same. If you'd like_

_to do that again sometime, I would be honored and delighted._

_Sherlock_

_P.S. I know I'm probably awful in bed. So sorry about that._

_Sorry about my bony hips and my weird shoulders and that_

_I'm an awful kisser. For what it's worth, I enjoyed it more than_

_anything I've ever done before, but I understand that I'm not_

_someone to have sex with. Let's do something different next_

_time._

 

"Sherlock!" John cried. "You're amazing in bed, you're so good, you're perfect for _me_. Because I love you, you're the only person I've ever loved having sex with so much. I didn't know you worried about that-"

"I don't, anymore." He paused. "Everything is better now." A soft smile was all the further reassurance John needed.

"I'm glad, baby. I wouldn't want you beating yourself up like that." He started to kiss Sherlock roughly. "In fact..."

"John, John - have you read the backside?"

"You're enjoying this too, aren't you?"

"What?"

"Me reading these old love letters? You're proud of them, you git!"

Sherlock sighed and rolled his eyes. "You love me. Now read it." And he gave his husband another peck on the lips.

 

_John -_

_I cannot stop thinking about you, just as I could not stop saying_

_your name last night as you fucked me to oblivion. (In the very_

_best way possible, John.) I do not regularly engage in sexual_

_intercourse, but you changed everything. I need you inside me_

_again, soon, I ache for your cock filling me up to make me lose_

_my mind. I want to kiss you and be kissed, not like on our first_

_date, but like last night, so hard and rough. I want to be pliant_

_under your touch and see your lust-crazed eyes roaming me_

_again, I want to touch your naked chest and dig into your back_

_when you thrust into me. I cannot stop thinking about your_

_cock wet with my spit right as you were about to fuck my mouth_

_because you just couldn't hold back anymore. I want to taste_

_you all over my mouth again. Please, John, for the love of God,_

_let's have sex again._

_Sherlock_

_P.S. Why did I bring God into this? He shouldn't be concerned_

_with our sexual escapades... Oh, to hell with it, your naked_

_body is my new god. Love you._

 

"Jesus! Sherlock..." John was breathing a little heavily. "Didn't know you were this good at dirty talk... can you do that next time?"

"Now?"

"Okay..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoo. Went a little overboard with that. Don't have much experience with smut but that was cool and fun (more like hot, haha). xx

**Author's Note:**

> Should I write another chapter? Also, should I do different styles? I already have some things in mind but what would you think of a kind of smutty note? (edit: been there, done that) Haha ;3 I would appreciate feedback and such! :) Have a great day lovelies!


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